Sunday, July 24, 2011

My beautiful new piece of art!

So, I signed my divorce papers this last week! Let the party planning commence!

I was off work for Thursday afternoon and all day Friday last week. Spent Thursday afternoon with friends at the pool, relaxing and then had a karaoke show Thursday night here in Ely. Good time all around.

Friday morning, I was signed up to do a Meals on Wheels route. Even though I had the day off work, I chose to go in and do my route anyway, because I felt like doing something good for the community. Seeing all the old people made me smile, and know that my volunteering is worth something.

On the way home, I drove past a tattoo shop and almost literally had to wrench my car away from turning into the parking lot. It wasn't the shop I wanted to go to, but the urge hit me that hard! So I turned to head towards the other shop and ended up stopping myself at the interstate and came home. Two reasons: 1) I hadn't thought through clearly what I wanted and 2) I wanted someone to come with me. So I head home, working through my thoughts. I wanted something that symbolized my strength and courage to move on with my life, but was feminine and still meaningful.

As I was driving home, Jen texted me asking what I was up to. I had thought she was working so I called her right away and asked what she was up to. She ended up not having to work, so I told her that she was coming with me to get a tattoo! I came home and started looking at designs. I had decided I wanted a tiger lily, my favorite flower ever- ditch variety please!

So I looked up the symbolism of the tiger lily... "The symbolism of the tiger lily is like other lilies in that they symbolize the feminine principle reflecting the qualities of mercy, compassion, kindness and unconditional love. Lilies are associated with the planet Venus, the water element and the goddesses Venus, [...]. However the Tiger Lily represents the more powerful aspects of femininity.
The tiger lily symbolizes female courage. It is a good flower for a career woman to carry in her bouquet down the aisle, and it's bold orange symbolizes personal wealth and career success.
The fact that the tiger lily is bright orange also speaks of joy, productivity and pride. The brown freckles on the flower's petals allude to the concept of always being in touch with one's creativity."

OMG, how perfect!!! So off we went, and Jeremiah happened to have an opening so he got started on the design. Here's the final product!!! It's not a great picture, but you get the idea. And it's so much prettier in person!

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

The Drive-In Movie!

Took Zach and his best friend, Jake, to the drive-in last night. Jake's mom decided to come at the last minute, and asked if I cared if she brought her other two little ones.  So we loaded up her vehicle with blankets, chairs, extra clothes, and plenty of food and candy to have the kids on a week long sugar high :)

We had a great time and the kids loved it!

Friday, June 3, 2011

Making a Difference

The world works in mysterious ways. Everything is connected, somehow, someway. It has been proven. "A small stone may make only a ripple at first, but eventually it becomes a wave" and all that.

The vast majority of the time, I am a very positive person. It’s not that I strive to be positive. That’s just who I am. I’m a happy-go-lucky type of girl. Do I have my bad moments? Oh yeah, all the time. I have my times when I’m down in the dumps and I’m irritated and depressed and pissed off. But I am almost always looking on the bright side of things, looking for that silver lining. I can choose to be depressed and pissed off…..OR I can choose to look at the way things COULD be. If I just accept a situation that is out of my control, and accept that I can’t change it, then my mood changes. I might not be happy about it, but I’m accepting it. And that’s the first step.

My new neighbor told me something yesterday that has been floating around in my head, like a piece of dandelion fluff. She told me that prior to moving in here, she had been feeling very down, depressed, and "fatalistic". Felt like nothing was right in her life. Then they moved to Ely, next door to me.

Now, I really only see this woman when we are standing outside smoking, and even though the conversations might only be a few minutes (usually a lot longer), we have had some very interesting talks. She has lived a fascinating, but rough, life. Some of the things we have discussed have intrigued me and really set my mind to thinking about things.

She stopped me yesterday when I got home from work. She told me that she hoped she had a chance to see me because something had been on her mind. She went on to tell me that since moving in, and with talking to me, she comes away feeling better. The "fatalistic" view on life that she had is slowly going away. She has realized where her passion lies, and what she wants to do. She is going to take the leap and follow her heart and passion.

This woman doesn’t know a lot of what I’ve been going through, but knows some of it. She knows that things aren’t easy for me right now, and that I have enough stuff going on to be down about. But she looked at me and said that I’m not letting it get me down like it would other people. And it encourages her. She told me that I have that effect on people, and I probably didn’t even realize it. That the things I do, no matter how small or big, have an effect on people. A smile, a talk with someone, my singing, and so on.

She said that she didn’t think I realized that I can affect people as much as I do. With my positive thoughts, always looking for the bright side of things in what is perceived as a bad situation, all the things that seem to come naturally to me. It’s just what I do. She told me that I should try and tap into that connection.
Basically, she told me that I’ve made a difference in her life, and she said that even though other people may not realize it, or acknowledge it, I’ve made a difference in their lives too.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Proud of myself....

I've made the decision to stop smoking! The only reason that I had started back up was because it's a stress thing for me....the day my world was turned on its side, I went and bought a pack. That was around Thanksgiving 2009. So, a year and a half later, I'm quitting. Work has a smoking cessation program, and I asked my boss if they would pay for acupuncture. I've always been an alternative medicine/therapy type of person, so thought I'd try it out. My last cigarette was on Monday, March 21st, just after lunch. Had my first acupuncture session that afternoon, and I haven't smoked since! I was doing really well the 24 hours, but around hour 30 (so 7:30 pm last night, March 22), I had a really bad craving. I almost gave in. I found some cigarettes that were in my car that I had forgotten about in my console.....oh, it was hard, but I resisted!

I've also come up with my secret postcard to send in to PostSecret....I could post it here, but what's the point? It's a secret! It involves me and my son, and my worries as a mom. That's all I'll give ya.

I was talking to Zach the other night about the constellations. The stars were out, and absolutely beautiful. I pointed out Orion to him, and showed him his "belt". He wanted to know who Orion is, so I started explaining to him that he was a Greek legend, the Great Hunter. Zach started asking questions, and I began explaining Greek mythology. Um, DUH. One of my goals is to re-read Greek mythology...perfect! So I told Zach that I would get a book that he could understand, and we could read about it together. He got pretty excited about it. He knows about Hercules because of Disney's movie, and therefore, a bit about some of the gods and goddesses. Leave it to Disney to explain!!! HAHA!

So that's my scoop for now. Karaoke is still going well :) Regular "game" night has sort of evolved into a "regular friends night"....we might hang out at someone's house watching a movie, go bowling, or head down to the local bar for dinner and enjoying everyone's company. Of course, there's always regular karaoke nights too!

Friday, March 4, 2011

Update 3/4/11

Well, things have been going pretty good. I've got the steady part time job doing karaoke every Saturday night- it doesn't pay much, especially since I share the show with one of my close friends, but hey- I'm getting paid to do something I LOVE. Can't beat that!!

Spring is right around the corner, and it's constantly on my mind. I've been thinking about trips that I'd like to do....the short little getaway by myself, especially. I'm debating on what I want to do-whether I want to go to a bed and breakfast, or if I want to go a bit more extravagent (on limited funds!!) and fly south, enjoy the beach. I don't know yet. I'll just have to keep it in the back of my head.

Another one of my things- to find a beer I actually like. Yeah, still no luck on that front! I tried Coors Light and Michelob Ultra Light....blech to both!! LOL! I've had someone tell me that I need to try a fruitier beer, maybe Leiney's Berry Weiss. So I'll have to check that out sometime.

Let's tattoo. Oh boy, I'm getting an itch, that's for sure! I haven't totally decided yet on what I'm going to get, but it's going to have something to do with strength or happiness. That will happen this summer!

Learning how to take a compliment well...I think I'm doing pretty darn good with that! I've had compliments on my hair, and on the weight I've lost. But I accept them gracefully and gratefully, and move on from the subject :)

The regular "game" night hasn't happened yet, but I am having regular nights out with my friends, so I just could possibly count that. Games would be fun too, though!

As for making a difference in someone's life like many have made in mine, I'm making progress on that all the time. That is a never ending one. I've had a couple friends make comments about that one item, and tell me how much I have done for them, and what it means to them. In turn, it really means a lot to me.

Gosh, I think that's about all for my update. See you next time!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

So Excited!

Got great news this morning! Found out that I'll be working my first karaoke show this weekend! YAY!!!
Cross #6 off my list...I'm on the way to a new part time career that I absolutely LOVE!!!

Monday, January 24, 2011

Week of 1-17-11 to 1-23-11...making small progress

So in the last week, I
~took Zach to a hockey game (tickets courtesy of my work)
~volunteered for Meals on Wheels
~continued training for my part time gig doing karaoke
~took a compliment gracefully

Not that these were huge things, and I know the volunteering isn't on my list, but I guess it could be called a reserve for my list. I should put up a couple of "reserves", just in case I don't get something on my list done.

I had a good week last week, for the most part. It seemed to drag on and on and on....I think it's because my coworker that shares an office with me was out most of the week. Her mom had passed away on 1-11-11, and so she only stopped in for a bit last week. I didn't have anyone to talk to, for the most part, so sat in my office and listened to LOTS of music. We always have music going in our office. Thankfully, we are both the same age, and listen to the same types of music, so we get along really well :) But last week, it was like I was dependant on music. I was continuously looking for music that suited my mood, or for something that would put me in a mood I WANTED to be in. If you are a Facebook friend, you probably noticed the links on my profile.

Thursday and Friday night, went out to karaoke with my friends. Great time as always. Friday night, my cousin and an old friend that I used to work with (back in the early 2000's) came out, so it was good to catch up with them. Saturday night, karaoke again, and this time, it was just me and my friend running the show, so I sat with him at the table and got a lot of training time in.

Sunday....I was just in a bit of a funk yesterday. I don't know what my problem was, really. Just felt "off" all day, I guess. I got Zach back around 12:30 or so. I had just talked with one of my best friends, and had planned on Zach and I going over to watch the football games yesterday with her and her boyfriend. Well, Zach got home and said he didn't want to, so we hung out at home. But he was constantly bored. His DVD player didn't work, the Netflix wasn't really working all that great on the Wii, and his constant complaining did NOTHING for my mood. So what did I do? Snapped at him, which I apologized for later. So when bedtime rolled around, we snuggled in bed, teasing each other with his stuffed animal turtle, and continued trying to find a name for the turtle, lol.

So here I am, starting a new week. I do have a book from the library to count toward my "classics"- To Kill a Mockingbird. I've had it for 2-3 weeks, and haven't touched it. I am just not in the mood to read that type of literature. I'm really into the paranormal stuff I read right now, so it's hard to switch over.

We'll see how this week goes, and if I feel the need to post again during the week, I will. Probably will be next Monday though. Thanks for stopping by!

Friday, January 21, 2011

Welcome to my journey

So, here's where my story begins.

I was married in 2002, to a guy I met the first day of college in 1997.

We had an amazing little boy, Zach, in 2004.

We moved around a lot, away from our families, and eventually settled about an hour away from "home".

Things were not always easy, and when I found some information that I was not at all pleased about, I decided that I couldn't do it anymore. I fought it, long and hard, but decided that life is too darn short to be unhappy.

So I told him I was done, and moved out in January 2010.

Here I am, a year later- almost to the exact day. Tomorrow will be a year out on my own.

I made it through the year just fine, for the most part. I am doing much better than I have in a LOOONG time.

I am HAPPY again.

I am ME again. Or at least, pretty damn close to it.

I am so much stronger than I ever could have thought about being.

So when 2010 was drawing to a close, I got to thinking. I'm in the process of rediscovering who I am. Who is Sara? So I came up with a list of things that I'd like to do before my next big birthday, 35.

August 25, 2013

I've got 2 1/2 years.

Age hasn't ever bothered me so far, and hopefully I will continue on that path. It's just a number. I sure don't feel 32, currently. Maybe it's because most of my friends that I hang out with on a normal basis are younger. I don't know.

But I came up with things that I've always wanted to do, or that I feel would make my life richer, more complete, more worthwhile.

And this blog is my way of documenting my journey, my trip, my adventure.

Welcome to the crazy train!